Blog : The Wicker Man.......remake

The Wicker Man.......remake

For those of you who have no understanding of the Hollywood movie remaking machine, perhaps I can explain how this film came about. This remake is actually a sequel to Nicholas Cage's The Weather Man which was itself a remake of Kevin Kline's The January Man, but set in February. The January Man was a thinly disguised remake of Paul Newman's The Mackintosh Man (which was a prequel to Spider Man) in which a man is bitten by a radioactive raincoat and gains all the superpowers of said garment – repelling water, drip dry capabilities for example. This was based on the detective movie The Thin Man, later remade as The Thin Woman, which replaced the male protagonist with a female gumshoe suffering from anorexia nervosa and motivated by a need to prove herself in a man's world of burgers and fries and milkshakes.

Cage's The Wicker Man is the fifth in his ongoing series of "man" or "men" films in which he plays "a man" or one of a group of "men." These include the previously mentioned "The Weather Man" along with "Matchstick Men," "Captain Corelli's Man Dolin and "The Family Man." The next in the series will be the Quentin Tarrantino scripted "The Man's Man" which Hollywood is set to remake as "Man, You Really Are A Man's Man, Man" six months following the release of the original movie.

None of this is true, but who would have been surprised if it was. Hey, maybe in a parallel universe it is.

OK, now the truth. Hollywood's attitude to arbitrarily remaking the cinematic world and his wife and children at the moment reeks of desperation. The increasing need to capitalise on original works by literally raping them, skinning them, abusing them, bastardising them, cannibalising them, rendering them lifeless, impotent and deathly truly stinks of creativity turned rancid and curdled in an ever progressing miasma of stagnation. They have learned nothing and proceed to learn even less. If you are going to remake something, at least have the common decency and respect for the original work and the creators of that original work to try and do it well.

bushtony

Added by joel on 9 September 2006